Wednesday, 21 October 2009

The Home Alone Kid

I work pretty long hours. Our office is open until 6pm, but you know how it is. Just finishing this, sorting out that, a quick chat with him, and a gossip with her takes time. By the time I get to the station and get home, it's usually getting on for 8pm.

It works out ok most of the time. If I'm meeting up with friends in the evening, I just meet them a little later. And frankly, it's not very London (daahling!) to eat at 6:30 anyway, so frankly, I'm just keeping them on the straight and narrow.

But on nights like tonight, when I have the whole blissful evening at home, I mind, just a little.

I spend so much of my day being a commuter, a customer, an employee, and then a commuter again, that I relish the hours at the end of the day (before I'm a snoozer) when I can just be me. Quietly, calmly and quite selfishly, just be myself in my clothes, in my house, in my space.

I love the moment when I can shed my office work clobber, and put on my own uniform. Slobby jeans, over-sized t-shirts, threadbare cardigan and fluffy socks. (I know ... you're wondering how a snappy dresser like me can possibly be single. It's a wonder to me too.)

There is nothing like the liberation of getting the radio on and knowing no-one will see if I have a bit of a dance in my kitchen whilst I'm cooking my dinner. And what freedom to sing along, especially when I don't really know the words! I'm the only person who can hear me, and I don't care if I'm a bit off with the lyric here or there.

If I want to retire to bed with a cup of tea and a good book (or, let's be honest, a trashy beach novel), then there's no-one here to judge me. If I want to eat ice-cream from the tub, no-one will know. If I want to watch French Kiss one more time, there is no-one who will roll their eyes.

Most of all though, I love the moment when the door closes. That split second when I go from being out, to being in, and I can relish the glorious isolation. I love the knowledge that it's just me, in my cosy little house for a few hours.

Yes, on night's like tonight, I resent every second I'm at my desk past 6pm, which is why tonight ... I was out the door on the dot. What joy!!


  1. You don't fool me. It's all Wolf Hall, Ingmar Bergman and Stravinsky at your place.

  2. Yay for finishing on time. A much under-rated and even berated pursuit.

    Yay also for dancing to the radio while in the kitchen. I find jazz the best for this, personally. Nice.

  3. I used to love my space when I lived on my own. Doing exactly what I wanted. Answering to noone. Spending hours in the bathtub reading Marion Keys books. Sigh. Enjoy the solitude.

  4. I miss that feeling! Especially that weird sensation that nobody in the world knows what you're doing right now, or where you are. Complete freedom that gets lost when children arrive.


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